Friday, April 20, 2012

sometimes yes, sometimes no

as many of you know, i have been essentially single-parenting for the last few months. as is so often the case, one never knows what one can handle until faced with the challenge. then, that thing that you always thought, "how do people do that?" becomes something that you just do because, well, because you don't really have another viable option.

and others act as though you have done something noteworthy. you know what i'm talking it about. it's that reaction you have when someone tells you they teach middle school: "oh wow. it takes a special person." or, "bless your heart." or, "well at least they don't drug test." and so it goes with my short and extremely supported stint at single parenting.

when people ask me how it's going i almost always say something to the effect of, "oh gosh, i can't complain. i've had so much help this might be easier than before jesse moved." and i'm not lying. i've had tons of help. between the five grandparents, the full time day care, and the emotional and financial support of my spouse albeit from a distance, i really can't say that i know what it's like to be a single parent. but then every once in a while something happens and you really need another person.

tonight i tried desperately to administer an inhaler with a mask to my near one-year-old. the doctor made it sound so easy. put the mask over his mouth and nose, one squirt, four breaths, one more squirt, four more breaths, every four to six hours.... there's just nothing like having a full fledged fight with a one-year-old. you will lose, and you will lose on so many levels.

in the end*, i waited until david fell asleep in my bed, administered the inhaler (one squirt, four breaths, one more squirt, four more breaths), and felt victorious. to hell with every four to six hours. i can't think that far in the future - i did it once, and i'm riding the wave.

but dang, i really miss jesse. and for all the "oh gosh, i can't complain" i share with people, i thought it appropriate to note that sometimes this really sucks.

if you can handle a lot of cussing, here's a video of another adult who made the mistake of a big fight with a little person. seriously, it's worth the six minutes...

* so that is how the story ended, but between the inhaler fight and the victory i did call poison control becasue i looked over at david (who was laying in my bed with me, but i was playing sudoku on my phone and not paying attention - yep. i'll be sure to add that to my mom-of-the-year application) and realized that he was gnawing away at the paint on his stainless steel water bottle. as it turns out, this is no big deal, but i didn't know that at the time, so i stayed calm, texted a friend, and called poison control.